Another day draws to a close, which means one step closer to my op!
I wanted to talk about the issue of losing my womb (and all the extra bits that go with it). On many sites I’ve come across it warns you about the emotional impact of losing your womb, almost grieving for it. Also, how many women may feel ‘unfeminine’ or not a ‘full woman’ without it. So far, with two days to go, I’m not feeling particularly emotional about losing my womb. Although, I found myself asking my husband the other night, if he was sure he didn’t want any more children! This was a very random question as our son is nearly 10 and we’ve not once thought of more children. So why am I questioning our decision/thoughts now? I guess I was just checking, even though I knew the answer. Perhaps it comes down to the ‘not in control’ thing again (which is what I said about the anxiety). It’s not really the fact of us wanting any more children, it’s just that this decision will be taken away from me/us. I would say, if you feel like this, it’s really good to open up and talk about it with your other half, it allows them to be involved. This does make me realise how lucky I am to have a partner to discuss this with, I am very much aware that there are many younger women going through this without a partner and that must be really tough. I would hope that if you’re in that situation you have a good family/close friends network. I’ve definitely realised that support is very much key. As it is, my husband and I still agreed that we didn’t want any more children.
Personally, at the moment I don’t think I will feel any less of a woman without my womb. That doesn’t mean to say this could change post op – and if it does, I know it’s ok, I knew I could get these feelings and I’ll work through it. I think I see it as, I’m still the same me, I’ve just got no more pain or issues which in the long run, will hopefully make me a happier person as I will have a better quality of life.